Purpose (and happiness) is born out of problems.
…and having a go-getter mindset to crush said problems to dust.
Happiness is simply a function of man’s goal oriented nature, a nature that demands he be constantly be working toward something difficult, worth obtaining and worth striving for.
It’s when this forward process is interrupted or taken away through defeat or a major setback that allows unhappiness to set in. Take a mans purpose away, you kill his soul because in life you’re either moving forward or you’re moving backward.
It comes back to mindset and your attitude toward achieving. More importantly, it’s about being mentally tough enough to rebuild when your life suffers a mini apocalypse (and it will).
Outward success does not always translate into into happiness however
Failure, yet still cultivating a winning attitude in spite is the essence of emotional maturity and a strong mind. Bruno Mars was dropped from his first record label. Michael Jordan did not make the cut for his high school basketball team. The thing is, failure will present itself always at some point in life no matter how talented or lucky you are.
Difficult things are difficult to achieve. They are also the only things worth striving for because they are the things you value.
This is nothing revolutionary.
We see this in the lives of others all the time. Individuals who are living a life we would consider a dream are really just working hard toward a treasure chest that’s empty or filled with counterfeit gold.
Like my younger self working hard to achieve that career with that name brand company so I can live in a nice apartment with my girlfriend who I could then eventually marry etc etc.
Living up to the expectation of others, convincing yourself it’s what you want is a form of delusion.
The capacity for enjoyment is the first to suffer when you do this, the next is your piece of mind. People who lose the the capacity for enjoyment seek to fill this emptiness with drug fueled nights, travel or meaningless sex. They convince themselves “they’re living the life” when deep down inside they feel that everything is a bore.
Now don’t get me confused for a puritan. I’ve had plenty of drug fuel parties, lot’s of sex and lot’s of travel myself. It’s when these things become vices to fill an empty life and your capacity to enjoy the more simple things is no existent you have a big problem.
Life has no purpose.
There is nothing to do.
There is no reason to do anything.
At points in our life we will say this to ourselves. We will look upon life, the absurdity of it all and laugh. Laugh at the folly of how the meaning of life is defined by one’s work. How the goal of life is to marry and have children. How wisdom is whatever the majority thinks. How passion is a blog post and bravery is saying something unconventional and impolite.
Purpose and Meaning
Life is absurd, but we can give it purpose and meaning. Our purpose and meaning, our capacity for happiness and enjoyment, the thing that keeps emptiness and despair at bay is simply working towards something worthwhile. It is the hope that the future could be better.
What this means can not be defined for you in particular. But the most common word is passion. When you have passion, purpose and meaning you will often be unable to stop from working. You will seemingly transform into a high energy person.
All your intellectual objections will melt away, gone will be the attitude that you’re simply on a treadmill. Sometimes perhaps, this could be achieved though something as simple as reframing your situation. You not be particularly enthralled with your employment, but if it enables you to take care of yourself and those you care about, happiness is found in that. But usually it’s simply because you don’t think big.
Thinking big should be a way of life. It should be taught in schools, it should be reclaimed for what it is, the source of happiness and fulfillment for your life.
Most people don’t think big, including me by nature. It’s something we have to be reminded to do. I had a conversation with Jacob Sokol, he reminded me to think big. We were talking about our ideal income, what kind of money would I like to be making and my answer was $3,000 USD. I already make a little more than this per month, but it’s from doing a bunch of different things.
If I was making that per month at a minimum every month from my websites, man I would be set. I could put aside the web design and teaching stuff I do and focus 100% toward my websites, writing and video making.
This is not thinking big. This is not thinking small either. This is thinking like everyone else.
Thinking big is to think of a goal that if you really achieved it, you would be blown away. In truth, what I want but am to shy to admit to even myself or others is that I want to be in really good shape and to be making $30,000 a month. An amount I can not even comprehend making at this point in time.
So start thinking big. Start taking action toward your ideal life and you’ll find that life slowly stops becoming a “bore” with “nothing to do.”
If you ever feel empty, that life is empty it simply means you’re not living a creative life. Your life has goals that are not important or your talents that are not being honed or utilized correctly.
Change this by thinking big and taking action everyday toward your goal. Be sure it’s what you really want too. DON’T conform to social norms like I did, because you’ll end up working toward a treasure chest that is empty itself. Leaving you no better than when you started.
If you’re into personal growth, and if you’re on the younger side. You should get Dr. Jordan Peterson’s book, 12 Rules for Life.
While I enjoy reading, Dr Peterson is a highly verbal man so the audio version is a true joy to listen to.