You already have the motivation for the things you care about. You don’t need to find “motivation”. You need persistence.
Stop talking, start doing. It’s cliche, I’m bored with saying this and you know it already. Yet, you persist to just want and not get.
Is your goal something you really want? Want it so bad that you would say you are driven and are willing to pay the price of your free time, comfort and relationships to achieve it?
Or is it something you would simply “like” to have?
The difference matters.
I’m asking because motivation gets conflated with INSPIRATION.
Inspiration is fuel, but the motivation is the engine and the engine has to already be there.
Inspiration comes in all sorts of forms. A great quote, a YouTube video on habits or goal achievement, books, audio programs, personal development blogs.
For me, stories of other people living the way I always wanted to live and making more money than me inspired me to achieve my NON-negotiable goals.
Do you have non-negotiable goals? Goals that you’re going to see through? Goals that you’re going to do everything within your power to see to the end?
The kind of goals where only an act of god will stop you?
Inspiration is essential.
Our thoughts are like a garden.
We have to continually consume content that helps to keep focused by banishing negative thoughts to the place where ever negative thoughts come from.
“Finding” motivation though, is the willingness to actually do something you really don’t want to do.
If you don’t want to do it, not much is going to motivate you.
Not until you get tired of yourself.
Of your excuses.
Of your lack of results.
Of your lack of manners, class, respect, character, integrity, money, whatever.
Stop searching for it. It’s there and will reveal itself when it’s time for you to change.
Talent alone is not enough either.
You need skill and talent, but nothing is more common in our world than unsuccessful talented men. Why? Because they tried to force themselves to do stuff they had no desire to do. Now, or ever.
Look, I don’t feel motivated to create one of those “niche websites” on student loans or some other random topic. I also don’t feel motivated to get a job in programming, or live in the middle of nowhere Texas like my oldest brother.
I have no desire, no motivation for any of these things and they do not happen. To try and find motivation to do one of these things is totally asinine. You’re either in a place where you want it bad enough or you’re just pretending.
I wrote an article on how I was fat.
I was not aware of how bad I looked. I honestly still thought of myself as the in shape person I was growing up. I did not run. I did not go to the gym. I always had an excuse. I became fat. When I realized this, I did not need to find motivation to loose my big belly. It was something I had to do.
I looked at myself and thought, this is unacceptable. PERIOD.
The same goes with diet. It’s easy to stop eating crap when it’s something you are determined as hell to do. I did not need any motivation to stop eating at night, start going to the gym, and cut out sugar from my diet.
Same with all those other fit guys at the gym I always see. None of us need to find motivation.
Same with all those other guys who have a successful online presence. The don’t need motivation to blog, post videos, build an audience. It’s part of the price with becoming a freelancer and eventually an online business owner: The habit of excellence.
To write it another way, they simply did what they felt compelled to do, no matter what. Even when it got hard. I guess this is simply a long way of saying you DON’T WANT IT BAD ENOUGH YET.
Time management is really self management, the most important aspect being saying no and disappointing people.
You can’t find motivation to do things you don’t want to do.
Motivation only comes once the pain sets in and then stays once you start getting results.
You don’t have the motivation to start something online?
You don’t have the motivation to get in shape?
You don’t have the motivation to stop being a shitty boyfriend?
You don’t have the motivation to wake up early?
You don’t have the motivation to start that podcast or YouTube channel?
It”s because you’re too comfortable.
1 – Stop lying to yourself
What are the pain point in your life?
What are the things that if they don’t change NOW, they will continue to get worse? This is your starting point. I want freedom. I’ve always wanted freedom. Like how I wrote about in why jobs suck. I would rather selling bowling balls online than be some high powered executive. Now that I have the freedom I’ve always wanted it’s unreal compared to my previous years of struggle. Working long hours at PwC. Then spending a few years being constantly broke, trying to figure out the next thing.
My motivation was that I never wanted to go back to that life. I never wanted to be broke again. I wanted to stop being a “pretend” man, and be a someone who has their shit together in all areas of life.
2 – Give up on the nonessential, then go after what you want.
You will have to give up things.
You also have to do new things.
Otherwise you will stay the same. Month to month, year to year. Doing the same thing with the same people.
To make significant life changes requires you to give up a lot. It requires you to become uncomfortable. I did not have a girlfriend for over a year for example. I had no business being in a relationship with anyone. I was a man possessed. In my free time I was at the gym or behind the laptop. I socialized enough to satisfy that desire, but otherwise I was a crazy person.
I did try having a girlfriend, but I was a shitty boyfriend. Selfish, emotionally unavailable. Again, I had no business being serious with anyone.
I’m not saying that YOU have to give this up. It’s just something valuable that I had to give up. I need to stop dating in order to have time to work, to stop spending money and to stop being distracted in order so I could get to a place where I could stop needing a job.
I know for a lot of people, a relationship is a powerful element that drives them. It makes them better. It gives them focus. You really have to know yourself with this one.
3- Don’t quit
Quit the way you’re going about things if they’re not working, but don’t quit the fix to your pain point.
I tried so many different things to make money in order to fulfill my need for freedom. All of them were things I had no “motivation” for. The projects however that now form my income base I never gave up on. I never quit because I already had the motivation for them.
So what are part of your life are you sick and tired of? What solutions to these problems are you willing to show up everyday for?
Stop looking for the motivation to work on stuff that you don’t care about.
Take back your self respect. Start being honest with yourself. Do the work